A DAY TO REMEMBER

theres always that one girl in a class or at school that sticks out to me...

you know the type. try not to let her catch me looking but i swear! i think this girl is eyeing me!...

 all year just hope well somehow meet but it never actually happens...

idk what got into me but i decided to walk to her nd just see what would happen...

i complimented nd simply let her know shes stooken out to me... 

didnt push it to much. didnt try nd get a number or anything. i just let it be... 

all she did was smile, i smiled back nd went to hit the books... 

class dismissed, she was still there. this time there was more exchanged, more than just looks... 

she walked to me, kinda nervous looking. we talked a little nd at the end she said thank you... 

asked her why, she said for making her day. nd with that i walked away right after i let her know she had just made mine too... 

its times like this that remind me of how much such little things can doo... 

SUICIDE

Im thinking about it, suicide...actions are louder than words, im about to yell it. BYE!...not gunna let god fire me, imma quit...if he wanted me to stay, he woulda put me in a place where i actually fit..They say being a coward causes these deaths but its a contradiction... Why? Cus not all have the balls to go through with it, being a coward also prevents it...Suicide is normal, the thought of it comes to everyone tryna' get by; Many die cus their afraid to live, but then again Many live cus their afraid to die. Its a war, there's 2 sides nd' im tryna figure out., fckk which one am I?!..

JUST HOW I SEE IT

the more you got insidee…

the more you gotta hide…

the more you hear about how perfect a couple is…

just means the more trouble in it is..

hear all these people talking bout their relationship like its some type of promotion…

promotion is for things that don’t sell, all lovey dovey but really its just lack of emotion…

so seriously, why be in a relationship?...

were all still to young, its to early, love aint shit…

everyones willing to cheat. You say “ nooo my girl or man wouldnt”…

sorry to break it to you but if you put enough in front of one, one will do something knowing that they shouldn’t…

still thinking naw my girl or man wont?..

sorry to break it to you but truth is that someone,,,, someone knows something,, something  that you don’t…

                                

TRUTH CAN BE STRETCHED SOME , BUT STRETCH IT TO MUCH ND THAT SHIT’LL EVENTUALLY RIP ND SLAP YOU…

LUST,  as little as its admitted or shown. its in everyone just takes different things to trigger it.

PATIENT OF PATIENCE

The doctor says I need this, she says I need that…

Putting me through so many tests, finding diseases I never thought id have...

Nd shes performed all kinds of shit on me, even 2 open heart surgeries…

She prescribes me things for the pain but they all make whats to come blurry…

Its all useless, you’re the only thing that can cure me…

Don’t wanna rush you, but please. Please hurry…

See during visiting hours I have girls walking in nd out of my room…

Nd I mean its comforting to have  in the process of getting better but its just not you…

They say love comes to one, one shouldn’t have to chase it…

So just know ill wait for you here, ill continue to be a patient of patience…

SOME OF WHAT I LISTEN TO

IS IT REAL?

QUESTION WE ALL COME TO ASK WHEN WE THINK TO HAVE FOUND IT

Don't look up to anyone; Just look at them... 

...

I looked in the mirror today nd saw someone I didn't know...
I saw a cover, the person you all know...
I stared at my body's eyes nd pictured a person internally beating behind my pupils walls,going crazy tryna get the fck out...
I pictured him going crazy tryna tell or show me something but he was locked in. Kinda like a jail cell. He'd scream nd he'd shout..

I pictured the little figure hungry nd desperate, fatigued from trying to escape...
think im weird? Fck it; this isn't poetry anymore, it's just expressing how I feel, nd I don't think anyone can relate...
I felt bad for him. I wanted to Help...
i related so much to him. I felt what he felt!...
I wanted to somehow set him free but I just couldn't. I didn't know how...
I shook my head nd went on with my day...

I layed down nd closed my eyes. Ready to sleep; saw his face again. He was moving his mouth to talk but I couldn't make out what he'd say...
It was me that put him in there! I didnt realise it til now...
Realised, I've forgotten who I am....wow...

always stuck to me

"i dont do things for you? okay tony so all the clothes and all the things ive bought you, thats not doing anything?"- one of the last things she said to me.

This girl spoiled me and i spoiled her back, we spoiled eachother...
Wasn't tip we broke up that I realized there was a huge difference between the gifts that we gave eachother...
We broke up so she gave me my shit back, I got everything she ever gave me and did the same thing...

I was kinda disappointed to realize she gave me alot more things than I got her. Wasn't til now that I realize she didn't return everything...
the rest of what I gave her lies in her heart, mind, and strength. They're things she can't nd won't ever give back...

Bitch was crazy to ever think she did more for me then I did for her; see the truest gifts are the ones you can't put in a box or wrap...
your stuck with all that I gave you, whatever you gave me. It's either in the trash or wherever you placed it after I gave it back...

what strength means to me

Crying nd breaking down; it's all a sign...
Signs of things that really meant something to us but takes acceptance to find...
It's how they say the ones that we love the most will hurt us the most, it's true...
it's vulnerability to the person that most matters; you...

See We cry because something once made us smile, and break down because of the loss of what used to keep you together...
Everything good comes to an end. We could mope nd feel bad or realize it's just how things are. Smile to one day cry, and build up to break down. I don't care for consequences; their inevitable...

Used to hear the word strength nd think of how hard one could pull or how hard one could push something...
I fell back nd realized it had nothing to do with that. strength is all about one thing...

problems get thrown at us randomly, never know when to expect it…

nd when they do come one should just catch it, learn to deal with and accept it…

Strength is resistance...
its here hold this,not about here try nd pick this up or see if you could move this...

Realized I don't go to the gym nd work out to let my anger out... I go to not only get physically but also mentally stronger which helps me find a way to keep my anger within nd be okay with it...

ill shake anyones hand...
a girl, boy, women or a man...
willing to meet anyone, dont judge it by what its doing or wearing...
do you, im not the type to be like wtfckk nd be staring...
ill shake it then begin to go off what im given...
life is a home, we choose who to live with...
not a germaphobe, see i know how long something needs to be on you before ones infected...
those are the hands i later on choose to no longer shake, later neglected...
+ or - ,problems get solved. things happens; those things become the divisor...
see ill shake anyones hand, intellect is the hand sanitizer...

someone told me i have a wrinkley face;ewwww haha i said bitch thats whats wrong with you!you worry bout all the wrong things; flip it. ive lived a happy life; ive smiled alot! ahaha

IRONING IRONY

 

ironing irony is endless. always wrinkles left or made in the process;thats life...

RESPECT

PeopleAlways ask what's up with me nd brass knuckles; it's not a symbolization of being a fighter or all that. Its a symbol of respect. Having the ability to hurt another but not doing so cus I respect the other nd that's not only physically but emotionally, socially etc.. I'm a big believer in respect being more than love. I can love someone I don't respect but I can't respect someone I don't love. THEY SAY HATE IS EASY ND LOVE TAKES COURAGE. RESPECT GOES BEYOND THAT.

letters to her

shes got a taste that always keeps me hungry...

knows how to put it all on the table, always knows just the right recipe...

 shes got a touch even the paralyzed can feel...

indescribable;it lets me know shes real... 

shes got beauty a blind man could see...

not just who she is, but the potential in who she can be...

 she gives messages even a deaf man could hear...

i hear her everyday, says to be patient. says one day shell be here...

were all gunna have our last sleep someday nd not know if well wake up nd if so; where well wake up...

so im fluffing my pillows nd fixing the sheets to fit me, life is just parts of what my real dream will be made of...

COMEBACKK

a kiss could be anything to a mans sentence; period, question mark, in this case it's a comma...

 Hadn't talked or seen her in a while, felt the need to nd decided to call her... 

started questioning nd worrying she wouldn't pick up, therefore i'm internally reminding myself why I made the call: she was always there to blur my problems , always had a way of helping me get things off my chest...

nothing like anyone or anything, different from the rest... 

Took my mind of things; no more such thing as stress... 

I need her right now, she knows me the best...

 So she finally picks up, tell her Im stressed; long story short she ended up sitting me down to write this...

No poetry is bad as long as it's honest; expressing how I feel, embraced in her pencil nd paper.Wasn't til now that I remembered how much I like this...